Help CenterReflecting is repeating back what we heard from the client. Reflections may be simple or complex.
Simple Reflections Examples
Mirroring
•Repeating what you heard nearly verbatim in the way they shared it
•Client: “I have so much to do I feel like my head is spinning.”
•Coach: “You feel like your head is spinning”
Paraphrasing
•Repeating what you heard in your own words
• Client: “I’m a senior and my GPA is horrible. Why am I even trying anymore? I’m not graduating anyway. I don’t even care. What’s the point? I’m so done.”
•Coach: “You’re so close to the finish line but graduating seems unrealistic.”
Summary
•Providing an abridged version of key points
• Coach: “Your goal for the session was to determine how to balance your work and life obligations better. You’ve determined you can begin planning using your schedule to
•ensure you get 7-8 hours of sleep on weeknights
•set boundaries around the days you will socialize vs. days for alone time
•and implement a morning exercise routine
Complex Reflections Examples
Empathetic Reflection – reflecting the emotion(s)
• Client: “I was so excited to go with the group to visit the campus. My parents won’t let me go because they don’t trust me to handle it on my own. (demeanor seems sad)
• Coach: “You’re sad to not get to go, because you were so excited.”
Reframing – framing the client’s story in a different way
• Client: “This has to be like the 10th time I’ve tried to get a gym routine going and it never works. I always stop going after a few weeks.”
• Coach: “You’re persistent. This seems quite important to you.”
Double-Sided – reflecting both sides of the situation, if the client seems torn between two options
• Client: “I don’t like how I feel after a night of partying too late, but I really enjoy spending time with my friends.”
• Coach: “Partying too late doesn’t feel good, but hanging out with your friends does.”
Metaphor – painting a picture of the client’s situation
• Client: “I was doing so much this school year with all of my college level classes and extracurriculars, I feel like I can’t relax now even if I want to.”
• Coach: “Kind of like after spinning around really fast for a bit. Our body still feels like it’s spinning for a while even after we stop.”